Yet Another Tory Leader - The Word Cloud Tarot Show - 20 Oct 2022

The #uk is collapsing, the #conservative #pm has resigned, the country is in #chaos and so the Tory MPs are trying to pick a new leader again.

Will they do any better this time?

What is happening?

@revpriest comes back off holiday a bit early with a prematurely-released new show-format to do a five minute #tarot reading on fuck me yet another new #tory #leadership #election.

SignificatorA - 14 Of Cups, King

14 - Cups - King

Our first candidate is the King of Cups, a calm and communicative man, he’s portrayed as generous and knowledgeable and reasonable.

He’s the competent choice, intellectual and trustworthy, thoughtful and mild

So I guess that’s Sunak?

SignificatorB - 10 Of Trumps, Fortune

10 - Trump - Fortune

Candidate B is fortune, a wild roll of the dice, the crazy candidate that might be an apocalyptic abyss_ or might be inevitable destiny, our fate as a country.

A reincarnation of a prior demise, the wheel of fortune rolling on.

That has to be Boris.

SignificatorC - 12 Of Trumps, Hangedman

12 - Trump - HangedMan

Candidate C is the Hanged Man. A unwilling and uncomprehending capitulation to crisis who was ceded power only after the denouncement.

He’s the stooge put up so the guilty could escape punishment.

So that’ll be Jeremy Hunt then.

IssuesA - 9 Of Pentacles, Gain

9 - Pentacles - Gain

What is the trouble with Sunak?

His life has been comfortable and blessed, he is a billionaire with a bountiful future whatever happens. He will be content and cushioned and his earnings durability is assured.

So ther is a guarantee of happiness and laughter and perks but probably not for everyone.

Only for him. Only the capital.

IssuesB - 21 Of Trumps, Universe

21 - Trump - Universe

The trouble with Bojo is that he promises the universe and achieves little. His promises the earth, the moon the galaxy, he promises potential but in fact never delivers anything but circular lies.

IssuesC - 11 Of Cups, Page

11 - Cups - Page

The trouble with Hunt is that while he’s articulate and boyish and calming, it’s all aesthetic.

He is only in place because he is opportunistic and a team-worker.

In the end is he just a page.

Not a king. Not a chancellor. Not even really a health minister.

Just a calming and eager idealist, too nuanced to be appealing.

Result - 12 Of Cups, Knight

12 - Cups - Knight

So the result?

We are looking for an artist who is also a bard, and a calm, charming and comforting dreamer.

A rationalist and realist, a selfless soothing thinker who is tolerant and whimsical.

It doesn’t really sound like any of them. Just as equally wrong for them all.

Could it be Starmer?

He is an actual Knight,

Which is still a thing, in this day and age, in a grown up country apparently.

Could the cards be suggesting that the UK will soon have Starmer as it’s leader?

If you think that’ll be any better.


Sunak is a rich man out of touch whose life of riches has not equipped him to understand real life.

Bojo is an outside shot, a roll of the dice, trying to be leader of a conservative party. He promises the universe, but he lies.

Hunt is only there by mistake, a sacrificial lamb, he’s just massively out of his depth like a little page.

None of these people are what the UK needs, they need an actual knight, maybe an actual Sir?

So the next Tory leader will be Starmer! We’ll have a Starmer flavoured blend of conservatism.

If you like these cards and want to do your own reading, tough.

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